Powerful, yes? This underscores to me why it’s a thing some couples are “meant” to pursue together. I can’t imagine not being there but I do think I’d accept it too, be willing to forego “being there” if it were our only path into cuckoldry. From some of what you’ve posted I gather she did have positive experiences. That must make it tough, particularly if you think some of her reluctance and pulling back may have been partly in reaction to that enjoyment, and possibly her way of protecting herself...and you too. I wonder how willing she was to share details. Do you think you two might be in a different place if you’d been able to validate her encounters in the moment, expressing your approval, etc ...basically getting off to her getting off?