My first time was in a hotel room with a guy my husband found on a swinger site. We had gone to Caliente in FL with the intention of maybe playing for the first time, but did not see anyone who interested me. Mostly because I was definitely black-curious and the crowd at Caliente was very white. So my husband arranged a meeting at a hotel in Tampa.
I was very, very nervous. Until that point I had only ever been with my husband, so it was a big step for me. Safety in a physical sense was not something I worried about. My husband was with me, and while at this point he looks like a pretty typical middle aged guy, I've known him since I was 15 and know that he was not always a nice guy, and can handle himself in a fight. So I'm pretty much always comfortable when he is around. We do always build in a measure of safety by being the ones to get the room. If there is ever an altercation in a hotel, the hotel with always side with the registered guest.
Don't believe the silly stories, which are almost entirely from silly men with a fetish, even when they are posting under a female name. You will not be so enchanted by black dick that you will lose interest in your boyfriend. If you do lose interest in your boyfriend, that just means you already had issues in your relationship you were not confronting. I prefer black men for extramarital play, in fact I am exclusively into black men for extramarital play, but there is nothing magical about the dick, it is just a different color. I find the color contrast hot, but people who go on and on about sex with a black guy being "primal" or their cum being more potent or their scent containing pheromones and all that ******* are: 1. racists, and 2. probably gay men.
My first time was great. He was not huge, about the same size as my husband in fact. But I was very high on some especially good weed, very aware of the naughtiness of what I was doing, and I had 7 orgasms.