In response to point 1. of yours... A marriage or any relationship depends on two people. It is a nice idea to "reassure" her that the marriage will be fine, but on another note, how does
she feel about it? - There are Women who have a predefined idea of what a marriage in their opinion should be like. If you change your lifestyle as a couple, will it still be the marriage she is longing for? Are you still the man she has intended to marry? Apart from that... There are people (Women
and men) who fall in love over sex easily. Does she see her/your marriage threatened by the possibility she may perhaps catch emotions and eventually leave you for another guy?
point 2. Constant messages can be fine as long as the partner (your wife/girlfriend) doesn't feel pressured. If you can make her feel like a "wifesharing" lifestyle is what you really want, it can be a start. But also there is an improtance of explaining
why you want it. What is
your gain as the husband? If you can't explain that in a manner that she will understand it, you will have a hard time convincing her. Also... it has to be something
she is also turned-on by. If that is not the case, you better leave it.
Most things you can read in the forums here are very sexuality-driven and most come from a male perspective. In the end it is not a question who brings up a lifestyle like this. (Sometimes it is the Woman/wife.) But the one who surprisingly listens to the suggestion of opening up the relationship (again, no matter Woman or man) is typically more concerned about the relationship itself than the potential sexual pleasure an altered lifestyle may provide. It is important to listen and understand what kind of emotions like fear perhaps your partner (wife) has and her concerns about an open/half-open sexual lifestyle. Many times a husband's mind may revolve around the sexual pleasures (for both) of seeing or knowing his wife receiving another man's dick, the wife will have questions instead like "Am I, the wife, or the sex life we already have not enough for my husband?" or "Does my husband suggest an open lifestyle because what he really wants is having sex with someone else himself?" - Typical questions that need to be addressed.