Does this come across all wrong? Just trying to be direct and upfront in trying to find a FWB

[newbecpl22]

On another dating site, we’re just starting to dip our toe in the water. Right out of the gate we had people coming at us left and right and none of them really reading our profile. So I typed up an email back to them. So far I’ve not gotten any responses. Maybe it’s too long or maybe it just comes across all wrong, but why beat around the bush. I keep hearing and seeing stories where things go all sideways from not vetting the potential buddy properly. In the end, we’d just like to find a guy that would just like to be chill and enjoy some sex without a lot of weirdness. Maybe some of this is best left to in person talking and feeling one another out, but why not just say what you want?


Thanks for reaching out to us.

I know you’re going to look at this and say holy *******, I don’t think so, but give it a read. We’re just trying to be up front and honest about this. Not trying to be assholes.

As a couple, we have a few questions for you.

Have you had experience with being with couples before?

Do you understand the Cuckold/Cuckoldress lifestyle and dynamic?
Tell us how you fit into this situation?

What is the main thing about a cuckold relationship as you understand it?

Just a few things to note.

We have a loving relationship and are looking to enhance it by inviting you in potentially. We ask that you respect our privacy and discretion. Everything is above the board as far as communications. Expect both husband and wife to see any communication you might send. We are a one sided ethical non-monogamy couple. Openness and honesty is key.

Mutual respect is also key and a requirement. We just want to have fun and enjoy some enhanced sex with your potential participation.

We hope it might turn into more than just a one time thing, but at the same time, we are not looking for a long term relationship with anyone.

We are not your booty call nor are you ours. We understand that, again all about mutual respect. We do have a busy home life and figure you do too. Things can and do come up and we hope should this proceed beyond talking online to a meet and greet and beyond, any changes to plans will be communicated quickly.

We will always play together and be together..Always! Hubby will watch and only join in if consent is given, but probably just watch. I, the wife is in charge of all.


We are not looking for a dominant Alpha type person. We do not wish to be dominated or owned or anything like that. Maybe a little ass smacking and some light hair pulling, but not much beyond, we can discuss further. Hubby is only submissive to me, the wife. Submissive is relative, if you meet us you’ll understand. He will not be submissive to you or for you.

Hubby does not want to touch you or fluff you or clean you or anything to that nature and asks the same in return. Neither one of us is anything but heterosexual. Hubby may clean wife up after you’re gone.

No anal, no face slapping, no *******. That’s about the extent of any limitations placed on sex, but No or Stop means just that.

We call ourselves a cuckold couple because we find ourselves somewhere between cuckold and stag/vixen in some aspects. Again we are a loving couple looking for enhancement. Hubby still pounds the pink and gets the job done just fine, just looking for a little extra fun. No one here is Beta. Wife will always be in control of the situation and call the shots and what she likes and don’t like, you will not! You will not call the shots for either under any circumstances. Again, respect is all that we ask for and we will be more than accommodating in return.

Wife may tease husband, but asks that you not unless wife says it’s okay. We are new to this, so not sure how it will be received. In truth, we’re not into a lot of the humiliation aspect of cuckolding. Just because we call ourselves a cuckold couple please don’t assume too much. Dirty talking is fine though.

 

[BDG69]

Very nice.

 

[wildgoodtimes3]

I don’t see the issue with this. Right to the point so there is no questions or wasted time…. As long as it is actually read haha.

 

[Jdingo619]

I will be honest it's fine overall but a bit long winded for an introduction!

I'm not saying not to communicate all of these things I am just saying not to communicate all this in your introduction. I would extract the key most important things and save the rest for the chatting and negotiation period after you have attracted a suitable playmate.

For example: "Were a new cuckold couple looking for possible long term playmate. We always play together and we are looking for someone respectful and descreet who's dominant and fun"! Then post some sexy pics and watch the Bulls bit you up!

A nice condensed summary of what you wrote just to start a dialogue with a good potential Bull because all that you wrote in the introduction is a swipe left for me!

Just my opinion!

 

[newbecpl22]

I will be honest it's fine overall but a bit long winded for an introduction!

I'm not saying not to communicate all of these things I am just saying not to communicate all this in your introduction. I would extract the key most important things and save the rest for the chatting and negotiation period after you have attracted a suitable playmate.

For example: "Were a new cuckold couple looking for possible long term playmate. We always play together and we are looking for someone respectful and descreet who's dominant and fun"! Then post some sexy pics and watch the Bulls bit you up!

A nice condensed summary of what you wrote just to start a dialogue with a good potential Bull because all that you wrote in the introduction is a swipe left for me!

Just my opinion!

Thank you for the feedback and giving it a look. We’ve dialed it back a good bit since I posted this and seemed to have some good results. After a bit I thought I was a bit long winded too. I really appreciate it!

 

[Justabbc4you]

That is a very reasonable request.

 

[cucktastrophe]

Grant it, I'm not the intended target of your message ... but my wife and I have vetted a number of prospective Bulls/boyfriends over the years. You're coming out of the gate waaaay too strong (and long). I'd keep it to around three sentences and take it from there. Remember, vetting is a process - not a one-off message. I think you're trying to do too much in too short a time. Just my two cents. Good luck.

 

[newbecpl22]

Grant it, I'm not the intended target of your message ... but my wife and I have vetted a number of prospective Bulls/boyfriends over the years. You're coming out of the gate waaaay too strong (and long). I'd keep it to around three sentences and take it from there. Remember, vetting is a process - not a one-off message. I think you're trying to do to much in too short a time. Just my two cents. Good luck.

Well taken. I think I wrote this out of aggravation of just a few short days being on the dating site and getting several responses that weren’t even close to what we were looking for. We dialed it back a good bit and have sense had some pretty good conversations. Thanks for taking a look, I really appreciate it.

 

[trainable69]

On another dating site, we’re just starting to dip our toe in the water. Right out of the gate we had people coming at us left and right and none of them really reading our profile. So I typed up an email back to them. So far I’ve not gotten any responses. Maybe it’s too long or maybe it just comes across all wrong, but why beat around the bush. I keep hearing and seeing stories where things go all sideways from not vetting the potential buddy properly. In the end, we’d just like to find a guy that would just like to be chill and enjoy some sex without a lot of weirdness. Maybe some of this is best left to in person talking and feeling one another out, but why not just say what you want?


Thanks for reaching out to us.

I know you’re going to look at this and say holy *******, I don’t think so, but give it a read. We’re just trying to be up front and honest about this. Not trying to be assholes.

As a couple, we have a few questions for you.

Have you had experience with being with couples before?

Do you understand the Cuckold/Cuckoldress lifestyle and dynamic?
Tell us how you fit into this situation?

What is the main thing about a cuckold relationship as you understand it?

Just a few things to note.

We have a loving relationship and are looking to enhance it by inviting you in potentially. We ask that you respect our privacy and discretion. Everything is above the board as far as communications. Expect both husband and wife to see any communication you might send. We are a one sided ethical non-monogamy couple. Openness and honesty is key.

Mutual respect is also key and a requirement. We just want to have fun and enjoy some enhanced sex with your potential participation.

We hope it might turn into more than just a one time thing, but at the same time, we are not looking for a long term relationship with anyone.

We are not your booty call nor are you ours. We understand that, again all about mutual respect. We do have a busy home life and figure you do too. Things can and do come up and we hope should this proceed beyond talking online to a meet and greet and beyond, any changes to plans will be communicated quickly.

We will always play together and be together..Always! Hubby will watch and only join in if consent is given, but probably just watch. I, the wife is in charge of all.


We are not looking for a dominant Alpha type person. We do not wish to be dominated or owned or anything like that. Maybe a little ass smacking and some light hair pulling, but not much beyond, we can discuss further. Hubby is only submissive to me, the wife. Submissive is relative, if you meet us you’ll understand. He will not be submissive to you or for you.

Hubby does not want to touch you or fluff you or clean you or anything to that nature and asks the same in return. Neither one of us is anything but heterosexual. Hubby may clean wife up after you’re gone.

No anal, no face slapping, no *******. That’s about the extent of any limitations placed on sex, but No or Stop means just that.

We call ourselves a cuckold couple because we find ourselves somewhere between cuckold and stag/vixen in some aspects. Again we are a loving couple looking for enhancement. Hubby still pounds the pink and gets the job done just fine, just looking for a little extra fun. No one here is Beta. Wife will always be in control of the situation and call the shots and what she likes and don’t like, you will not! You will not call the shots for either under any circumstances. Again, respect is all that we ask for and we will be more than accommodating in return.

Wife may tease husband, but asks that you not unless wife says it’s okay. We are new to this, so not sure how it will be received. In truth, we’re not into a lot of the humiliation aspect of cuckolding. Just because we call ourselves a cuckold couple please don’t assume too much. Dirty talking is fine though.

On another dating site, we’re just starting to dip our toe in the water. Right out of the gate we had people coming at us left and right and none of them really reading our profile. So I typed up an email back to them. So far I’ve not gotten any responses. Maybe it’s too long or maybe it just comes across all wrong, but why beat around the bush. I keep hearing and seeing stories where things go all sideways from not vetting the potential buddy properly. In the end, we’d just like to find a guy that would just like to be chill and enjoy some sex without a lot of weirdness. Maybe some of this is best left to in person talking and feeling one another out, but why not just say what you want?


Thanks for reaching out to us.

I know you’re going to look at this and say holy *******, I don’t think so, but give it a read. We’re just trying to be up front and honest about this. Not trying to be assholes.

As a couple, we have a few questions for you.

Have you had experience with being with couples before?

Do you understand the Cuckold/Cuckoldress lifestyle and dynamic?
Tell us how you fit into this situation?

What is the main thing about a cuckold relationship as you understand it?

Just a few things to note.

We have a loving relationship and are looking to enhance it by inviting you in potentially. We ask that you respect our privacy and discretion. Everything is above the board as far as communications. Expect both husband and wife to see any communication you might send. We are a one sided ethical non-monogamy couple. Openness and honesty is key.

Mutual respect is also key and a requirement. We just want to have fun and enjoy some enhanced sex with your potential participation.

We hope it might turn into more than just a one time thing, but at the same time, we are not looking for a long term relationship with anyone.

We are not your booty call nor are you ours. We understand that, again all about mutual respect. We do have a busy home life and figure you do too. Things can and do come up and we hope should this proceed beyond talking online to a meet and greet and beyond, any changes to plans will be communicated quickly.

We will always play together and be together..Always! Hubby will watch and only join in if consent is given, but probably just watch. I, the wife is in charge of all.


We are not looking for a dominant Alpha type person. We do not wish to be dominated or owned or anything like that. Maybe a little ass smacking and some light hair pulling, but not much beyond, we can discuss further. Hubby is only submissive to me, the wife. Submissive is relative, if you meet us you’ll understand. He will not be submissive to you or for you.

Hubby does not want to touch you or fluff you or clean you or anything to that nature and asks the same in return. Neither one of us is anything but heterosexual. Hubby may clean wife up after you’re gone.

No anal, no face slapping, no *******. That’s about the extent of any limitations placed on sex, but No or Stop means just that.

We call ourselves a cuckold couple because we find ourselves somewhere between cuckold and stag/vixen in some aspects. Again we are a loving couple looking for enhancement. Hubby still pounds the pink and gets the job done just fine, just looking for a little extra fun. No one here is Beta. Wife will always be in control of the situation and call the shots and what she likes and don’t like, you will not! You will not call the shots for either under any circumstances. Again, respect is all that we ask for and we will be more than accommodating in return.

Wife may tease husband, but asks that you not unless wife says it’s okay. We are new to this, so not sure how it will be received. In truth, we’re not into a lot of the humiliation aspect of cuckolding. Just because we call ourselves a cuckold couple please don’t assume too much. Dirty talking is fine though.

Where are you located? I’m in North Atlanta Georgia

 

[JacobSpanks]

On another dating site, we’re just starting to dip our toe in the water. Right out of the gate we had people coming at us left and right and none of them really reading our profile. So I typed up an email back to them. So far I’ve not gotten any responses. Maybe it’s too long or maybe it just comes across all wrong, but why beat around the bush. I keep hearing and seeing stories where things go all sideways from not vetting the potential buddy properly. In the end, we’d just like to find a guy that would just like to be chill and enjoy some sex without a lot of weirdness. Maybe some of this is best left to in person talking and feeling one another out, but why not just say what you want?


Thanks for reaching out to us.

I know you’re going to look at this and say holy *******, I don’t think so, but give it a read. We’re just trying to be up front and honest about this. Not trying to be assholes.

As a couple, we have a few questions for you.

Have you had experience with being with couples before?

Do you understand the Cuckold/Cuckoldress lifestyle and dynamic?
Tell us how you fit into this situation?

What is the main thing about a cuckold relationship as you understand it?

Just a few things to note.

We have a loving relationship and are looking to enhance it by inviting you in potentially. We ask that you respect our privacy and discretion. Everything is above the board as far as communications. Expect both husband and wife to see any communication you might send. We are a one sided ethical non-monogamy couple. Openness and honesty is key.

Mutual respect is also key and a requirement. We just want to have fun and enjoy some enhanced sex with your potential participation.

We hope it might turn into more than just a one time thing, but at the same time, we are not looking for a long term relationship with anyone.

We are not your booty call nor are you ours. We understand that, again all about mutual respect. We do have a busy home life and figure you do too. Things can and do come up and we hope should this proceed beyond talking online to a meet and greet and beyond, any changes to plans will be communicated quickly.

We will always play together and be together..Always! Hubby will watch and only join in if consent is given, but probably just watch. I, the wife is in charge of all.


We are not looking for a dominant Alpha type person. We do not wish to be dominated or owned or anything like that. Maybe a little ass smacking and some light hair pulling, but not much beyond, we can discuss further. Hubby is only submissive to me, the wife. Submissive is relative, if you meet us you’ll understand. He will not be submissive to you or for you.

Hubby does not want to touch you or fluff you or clean you or anything to that nature and asks the same in return. Neither one of us is anything but heterosexual. Hubby may clean wife up after you’re gone.

No anal, no face slapping, no *******. That’s about the extent of any limitations placed on sex, but No or Stop means just that.

We call ourselves a cuckold couple because we find ourselves somewhere between cuckold and stag/vixen in some aspects. Again we are a loving couple looking for enhancement. Hubby still pounds the pink and gets the job done just fine, just looking for a little extra fun. No one here is Beta. Wife will always be in control of the situation and call the shots and what she likes and don’t like, you will not! You will not call the shots for either under any circumstances. Again, respect is all that we ask for and we will be more than accommodating in return.

Wife may tease husband, but asks that you not unless wife says it’s okay. We are new to this, so not sure how it will be received. In truth, we’re not into a lot of the humiliation aspect of cuckolding. Just because we call ourselves a cuckold couple please don’t assume too much. Dirty talking is fine though.

I don't think you being direct and open is the problem.

I'm just trying to give you constructive criticism to be helpful in getting what you want. I'm not sure why anyone else here hasn't mentioned it. I guess I'm like you—I'm just being direct. And, as with any social media post, it's just my opinion.

My thought is what your asking for doesn't really mesh together. First off, I think you should identify as swingers. Not Hotwife/Cuckold and not even Vixen/Stagg. You are essentially asking for a Submissive Bull. You're going to end up with a lot of submissive posers. They just want to get laid. In reality, you will get many flakes, and cowards that will not show up.

Then take a hard look at all your conditions and hard boundaries. I understand your need to be selective and carefully vet the candidates—you are looking for a quality man. But, ask yourself, would you respond if to your advertisement?

Without going over each line. Your asking a lot of a quality man and not giving what that type of man would want. Their is no possibility of a long-term arrangement. Yet, you don't want it to be a one-off thing either. I could go on and on about all the do not's.

Think of it as a resume. The objective is to get responses. Don't try to close the deal. Just write it to make the quality man want to be involved with you. Then weed out the undesirables. What you want is someone just like the both of you. That is not what your post is saying.

Well, good luck.

 

[newbecpl22]

I don't think you being direct and open is the problem.

I'm just trying to give you constructive criticism to be helpful in getting what you want. I'm not sure why anyone else here hasn't mentioned it. I guess I'm like you—I'm just being direct. And, as with any social media post, it's just my opinion.

My thought is what your asking for doesn't really mesh together. First off, I think you should identify as swingers. Not Hotwife/Cuckold and not even Vixen/Stagg. You are essentially asking for a Submissive Bull. You're going to end up with a lot of submissive posers. They just want to get laid. In reality, you will get many flakes, and cowards that will not show up.

Then take a hard look at all your conditions and hard boundaries. I understand your need to be selective and carefully vet the candidates—you are looking for a quality man. But, ask yourself, would you respond if to your advertisement?

Without going over each line. Your asking a lot of a quality man and not giving what that type of man would want. Their is no possibility of a long-term arrangement. Yet, you don't want it to be a one-off thing either. I could go on and on about all the do not's.

Think of it as a resume. The objective is to get responses. Don't try to close the deal. Just write it to make the quality man want to be involved with you. Then weed out the undesirables. What you want is someone just like the both of you. That is not what your post is saying.

Well, good luck.

Thanks for the honest feedback. We dialed it back a good bit and took our time, well, she took her time and we found two really good bulls. Our first was an older white guy with a dick like a beer can. My wife puts it as “he understood the assignment. Gave her a good dickin down and was respectful to both of us, but took charge in the end. We both like him. The other gentlemen is a black guy, very nice and respectful to both of us, butter smooth, she likes him equally, again understood the assignment and gives it to her good. We’ve seen them both about 5-6 times total and really enjoyed it. I think eventually we’ll venture out, maybe look for a guy who may or may not be more dominant. It’s really in her hands and I just enjoy the ride. I think my initial post was more out of a little fear of the unknown and frustration. I was getting frustrated that people just weren’t reading our profile and coming at us all wrong. Ultimately, I left it in her hands and she would pick and choose who she talked to and who she didn’t. The one thing she said that we did keep on seeing was that if you talked to them long enough back and forth, their true side would come out and you could see if they were wanting a quick fuck or if they were truly into the lifestyle. I’m sure we/she put a lot of guys off wanting to chat just a bit, but I guess it is what it is. There were sure some doosies to filter through. Wow!
Thanks again!