AFRAID OF WHAT FAMILY MIGHT THINK?

[SCBlknNsty]

When I was in the navy I lived with a white female sailor in San Diego; we both went home for Christmas, me to SC, her to KS. She called Christmas night to ask if it was cool for her to go back to SD early. I had no problem but asked if everything was ok and she said it was.....but when I got back she told me they were sitting at dinner and her grandfather put a 38 on the table and told her he'd rather see her shoot herself than sleeping with that n***r. Ironically I had talked to her mom, his *******, earlier that day and she'd gotten on the phone to tell me she appreciated that my influence calmed down her rebellious to the degree of getting into serious trouble attitude.

Sex, emotions, and self assessment are self growth places, all legitimate. Family, and their emotional and growth influence, just as legitimate.

And to be both open and honest, I know a number of brothers who caught hell from family for 'bringing that white girl home'.

 

[QOS Tamer]

When I was in the navy I lived with a white female sailor in San Diego; we both went home for Christmas, me to SC, her to KS. She called Christmas night to ask if it was cool for her to go back to SD early. I had no problem but asked if everything was ok and she said it was.....but when I got back she told me they were sitting at dinner and her grandfather put a 38 on the table and told her he'd rather see her shoot herself than sleeping with that n***r. Ironically I had talked to her mom, his *******, earlier that day and she'd gotten on the phone to tell me she appreciated that my influence calmed down her rebellious to the degree of getting into serious trouble attitude.

Sex, emotions, and self assessment are self growth places, all legitimate. Family, and their emotional and growth influence, just as legitimate.

And to be both open and honest, I know a number of brothers who caught hell from family for 'bringing that white girl home'.

So she was your girlfriend? Sorry to hear that. It's good that she didn't want to have that mindset and rather go back.

 

[DRWho]

At the time it first began, late 1970's, we had to be totally discrete. No choice at that time in the coastal NC area we resided. Had my co workers known that Sarah's regular lover was my black co worker Thomas, Thomas and I would likely have lost our jobs, and we would have been ostracized in the community and at our church. Back home in the Mountain South area of VA/TN/NC where we grew up NO WAY we could let Family, friends and community know, as too many would not be able to understand and would be hurt by our activities. Even today, back home in the VA/TN/NC mountains among family, friends, community and church, even though I lost Sarah in 2015, I have digitized all the videos and pictures of when Thomas and Sarah were regular lovers, 1978-88, uploaded them to a private cloud, and destroyed all originals. It is the simplest thing to do to protect Sarah's memory among children, grand children, family, church and community. I'm very proud of the decision Sarah and I made in 1978 about our good friend Thomas becoming her lover, and have no regrets whatsoever. However, many people simply cannot understand such things, and I cannot change the world all by myself. I can only control my little piece of the world! Sometimes we just have to accept the limitations of others, and deal with those limitations on a "Real World" basis.

 

[Abbybadwife]

My family is why I never dated a black man, ironically it was my husband that introduced me to my first Black lover.