I think one of the biggest hurdles for men is willy shaming. I guess very much in the same vain as slut or body shaming,
Men need help and support to be able to accept themselve for what they are, and should be proud of whatever they have, even if they are small, have ED or are quick cummers. Only when they have accepted and can fully love themselves, released any shame that they may feel can they start to embrace themselves and their gf/wife to open thier minds to hotwifing and cuckolding.
I think all men know how they stack up against each other, but most hid away in fear of being called out.
This can be seen everyday in gym locker rooms and toilets where guys try to hide away and sheild their willies from view. As a socity we need to be more grown up, open and accepting about this.
I truely believe that this type of male 'shame' has led to lots of cases of domestic violance, sexual crimes and mental health issues due to these people feeling sexually frustrated, shamed and isolated.