my advice to convince your wife/gf to try a BBC

[bloupbloup]

Here are some conclusions of related to my observations.
Discussing sex with a BBC to a woman who never had any experience with big cocks may makes her stressful.
I think porn is a bad model because it brings us an idealized version of interracial sex with bbc.

1/ Don't talk about sex with a BBC right away
2/ Show her bbc porn
3/ No plan for a distant future
4/ best environment
5/ it should look natural

1/ Don't talk about sex with bbc right away because your significant other can get stressed about this idea. She may wonder if it hurts. She does not know whether she can accommodate such a big cock.

2/ Show her porn video with BBC to see her reaction. Look at her eyes. If she can't stay focus, and can't watch the video, it means it will never work and you should forget the idea of convincing her. Conversely, If she stars at the bbc, it means she is naturally aroused by the view of a BBC. Body language is much more reliable than anything else.

3/ don't say that you have a plan "for a distant future". There is no room for uncertainty. Either you have a plan or you have no plan. Don't talk about any plans if you have no plans.

4/ the best environment is when she is relaxed. It will be easier to convince her on holidays in Cancun, Jamaica or Dominican republic rather than at your living place.

5/ things should look natural, i think it is a very big challenge to convince your woman to go to a hotel and play with a well-endowed man that she never met. It would be more natural to introduce a man to your woman and say he is your coworker, a distant friend, a friend of a relative...


Stories behind my points:
I experienced situations where I witnessed how out of ordinary and difficult it was for a white woman to find herself with a BBC for the first time in her life.

There are many women who relay fake stories about sex with BBC. These women say it hurts but they never experienced it themselves. So, these toxic women may repeat it to your female friend and then, your female friend may have this toxic stereotype in her mind.

Therefore, it is much better to introduce your female friend to a black man without talking too much about sex with him beforehand.

I think it is better to get to the action right away because thinking about it or talking about it isn't productive. It is very tempting to talk about it with your significant other but I found that it didn't help at all.

 

[mywayintermsofsex]

There is plenty of advice and even "guids" out there. But nobody ever seems to start with the most important step which would be step zero!

0/ Be aware that having a fantasy and carrying that fantasy out in real life can be and most often are very different things! So be sure you really want it to happen for real before bringing it up to her and before even making allusions!

Another step zero - just as essential - is being sure the wife/GF is made for a lifestyle of being shared (sexually) because not every female is. It takes a very special Woman to have that fantasy fulfilled with. Not every Woman is eligible for that. And if she isn't then better keep it a (secret) fantasy.

 

[Rodgersmith1]

Once the idea has been successfully planted and she’s going with the fantasy of it ….whispering in her ear during sex is a great step in convincing her to make the leap…some of the lines I would feed her and notice that had touched a nerve was … “ and then you feel him deeper “ “ you’re in bed all alone with him he’s deep inside “ “ oh no he’s not wearing a condom and it’s so high risk “ ….. all this is in gentle whispers in her ear as you’re going it missionary

Then you say “ do you want to feel that ? “ you’ll hear a soft whimper “uh huh “ then say “ holding on to darker muscles as he’s making love to you deep inside unprotected “ “ feeling him slowly making love to you deep “ then say “ do you want that ?” You’ll hear a verbal “ yes “

When you know she’s ready to cum drop this on her … “ and then you feel him cum warmly deep inside … there’s nothing between you two and he’s releasing his seed deep deep inside you as you hold him “. Then say “ don’t you want that ?…. She will confidently say “ yes “ then you say I want you to feel that too .

You know she’s absolutely ready and now very much thinking about it all day long

 

[mywayintermsofsex]

@Rodgersmith1: Thank you for sharing your ideas. But seriously, this is not the story forum. While conveying the fantasy to the wife/GF is an important part of the process and roleplaying scenarios such as you describe fit into that, those alone are never sufficient for her to take the leap.
If it was all a matter of "dirty talk" or "pillow talk" alone, most probably she would have thought her hubby/BF was nothing but a horny lad whenever he's hot and that is that.

If you really wish to make the leap as a couple, you need to take the conversation out of the bedroom. Without mutual understanding of each others wants and what both of you expect to get out of a shared arrangement, without having discussed each others boundaries / big no-nos, without having built that trust in each other that allows for an honest discussion of all this - all of which is asking for thorough conversations in a non-sexual context - it will most probably never happen or not go well. :|

So, to sum it up (including my earlier post):

0/a. Know what you want (make sure you will be able to handle and enjoy the reality once the fantasy is being fulfilled)! And know why you want it (know yourself, try to understand what you are expecting to get out of sharing your Woman for yourself)!

0/b. Make sure she will be able to handle and enjoy the reality of being sexually shared with other people. - If that's not her, do not procede! If she is an asexual person or naturally has a rather low libido, do not procede! If she is not enabled to differenciate between lust and love but usually falls in love over sex easily, do not procede! It takes a very special Woman to have a wifesharing lifestyle with. If that's not your wife/GF then better accept the facts and do not procede! If you take it further nonetheless you are heading into unavoidable trouble and perhaps risk your relationship and losing your Woman. Seriously!

1/a. Intoduce wifesharing as a fantasy into your bedroom. Roleplay scenarios, "dirty-talk", introduce toys to your sexual play, add p0rn, etc. You may do any of that and more but need not do it all. Especially, if something does not appeal to your wife/GF, you can still try it (she will probably agree to trying it once) and see her reaction. But do not repeat if it makes her feel uncomfortable! Always include her fantasies as well even they might not be the same as yours. And do not overdo. "Vanilla lovemaking" in-between makes for a great bond between you and your Woman and helps to avoid pressure on her which is very important if you want to be successful at sharing her eventually. Do not avoid experimenting but be(come) a sexually adventurous and open-minded couple. This will highten your Woman's libido. Also the step to introducing a third player (in a threesome scenario, for instance) will be(come) smaller, if the two of you are playful/adventurous together already.

1/b. Bring it up in a non-sexual environment. This is essential! During sex and arousal many kinky or even silly things are being said and played, often, but once the mind has cooled off those often go away. Most probably a wife or girlfriend wouldn't suspect her man who has that kinky mind in the bedroom to also want things to happen for real. Bringing up the topic outside the bedroom honestly and seriously is the only way to raise awareness that this is more than just a fantasy. Do not push it! Give her time to think about it and let her mind wander. She may "learn" to like that idea. Be prepared she will dig deeper (with questions - see 0/a. Know yourself and what excites you about sharing your Woman!). Be prepared to answer her questions instead of going silent or stammering because that would give the impression that you are not actually sure and convinced yourself. Make it about her and you. If you point out the advantages for one of you only, it won't be received as positively. Make it truly a "couple thing", an experience to add to your sexual adventures. And make sure both of you understand the difference between intramarital sex including a third person/"player" and extramarital sex/cheating - because those two are actually opposites! Again (like in 1/a.) include her ideas as much as your own (even though they might not be exactly the same)! Discuss each of your boundaries, formally agree on them, and always respect them without exception!

2. This is about making the leap as a couple. But this post is long already. Perhaps i will share my thoughts on that later, if anybody likes to know.

 

[Kinky69fun60]

@Rodgersmith1: Thank you for sharing your ideas. But seriously, this is not the story forum. While conveying the fantasy to the wife/GF is an important part of the process and roleplaying scenarios such as you describe fit into that, those alone are never sufficient for her to take the leap.
If it was all a matter of "dirty talk" or "pillow talk" alone, most probably she would have thought her hubby/BF was nothing but a horny lad whenever he's hot and that is that.

If you really wish to make the leap as a couple, you need to take the conversation out of the bedroom. Without mutual understanding of each others wants and what both of you expect to get out of a shared arrangement, without having discussed each others boundaries / big no-nos, without having built that trust in each other that allows for an honest discussion of all this - all of which is asking for thorough conversations in a non-sexual context - it will most probably never happen or not go well. :|

So, to sum it up (including my earlier post):

0/a. Know what you want (make sure you will be able to handle and enjoy the reality once the fantasy is being fulfilled)! And know why you want it (know yourself, try to understand what you are expecting to get out of sharing your Woman for yourself)!

0/b. Make sure she will be able to handle and enjoy the reality of being sexually shared with other people. - If that's not her, do not procede! If she is an asexual person or naturally has a rather low libido, do not procede! If she is not enabled to differenciate between lust and love but usually falls in love over sex easily, do not procede! It takes a very special Woman to have a wifesharing lifestyle with. If that's not your wife/GF then better accept the facts and do not procede! If you take it further nonetheless you are heading into unavoidable trouble and perhaps risk your relationship and losing your Woman. Seriously!

1/a. Intoduce wifesharing as a fantasy into your bedroom. Roleplay scenarios, "dirty-talk", introduce toys to your sexual play, add p0rn, etc. You may do any of that and more but need not do it all. Especially, if something does not appeal to your wife/GF, you can still try it (she will probably agree to trying it once) and see her reaction. But do not repeat if it makes her feel uncomfortable! Always include her fantasies as well even they might not be the same as yours. And do not overdo. "Vanilla lovemaking" in-between makes for a great bond between you and your Woman and helps to avoid pressure on her which is very important if you want to be successful at sharing her eventually. Do not avoid experimenting but be(come) a sexually adventurous and open-minded couple. This will highten your Woman's libido. Also the step to introducing a third player (in a threesome scenario, for instance) will be(come) smaller, if the two of you are playful/adventurous together already.

1/b. Bring it up in a non-sexual environment. This is essential! During sex and arousal many kinky or even silly things are being said and played, often, but once the mind has cooled off those often go away. Most probably a wife or girlfriend wouldn't suspect her man who has that kinky mind in the bedroom to also want things to happen for real. Bringing up the topic outside the bedroom honestly and seriously is the only way to raise awareness that this is more than just a fantasy. Do not push it! Give her time to think about it and let her mind wander. She may "learn" to like that idea. Be prepared she will dig deeper (with questions - see 0/a. Know yourself and what excites you about sharing your Woman!). Be prepared to answer her questions instead of going silent or stammering because that would give the impression that you are not actually sure and convinced yourself. Make it about her and you. If you point out the advantages for one of you only, it won't be received as positively. Make it truly a "couple thing", an experience to add to your sexual adventures. And make sure both of you understand the difference between intramarital sex including a third person/"player" and extramarital sex/cheating - because those two are actually opposites! Again (like in 1/a.) include her ideas as much as your own (even though they might not be exactly the same)! Discuss each of your boundaries, formally agree on them, and always respect them without exception!

2. This is about making the leap as a couple. But this post is long already. Perhaps i will share my thoughts on that later, if anybody likes to know.

I think so far that has been the best and most honest advice I came across. I’m trying to overcome this hurdle, like many other aspiring cucks. I try not to push it or frighten her with my fantasies, although at time I’m sure I am going about it all wrong. Some women were perhaps not made out for this and learning to accept it takes work on my part rather pushing her into something she might not be into.

 

[nancyscuck]

There is plenty of advice and even "guids" out there. But nobody ever seems to start with the most important step which would be step zero!

0/ Be aware that having a fantasy and carrying that fantasy out in real life can be and most often are very different things! So be sure you really want it to happen for real before bringing it up to her and before even making allusions!

Another step zero - just as essential - is being sure the wife/GF is made for a lifestyle of being shared (sexually) because not every female is. It takes a very special Woman to have that fantasy fulfilled with. Not every Woman is eligible for that. And if she isn't then better keep it a (secret) fantasy.

Great advice thanks

 

[skydriver]

Definitely great tips!
My gf and I seem to be stuck at step 1... we have talked about it "in the bedroom", while she is a little dr_unk and aroused and she seems to want a 3some with bbc... I even went looking for a partner (including on this site), had guys reach out, showed her their pictures, she got super turned on (she was again a little tipsy) and started saying things like "black guys are so hot" and "I want a black cock so bad".... but once out of the bedroom and when the alcohol and the arousal wears off, she has mlno interest in any of this... so what to do?

 

[mywayintermsofsex]

Don’t push it. She is getting wild and into it in the bedroom. That is a huge positive. If you ******* things and go beyond what she is comfortable with you risk undermining her trust and safety concerns which will make your road much, much tougher. Just be chill.

Maybe you could take her out to a dance club and after an adult beverage tell her you think it would be so hot to watch her just dance with a black guy, nothing more than that. “To watch some good looking black guy watching you move and massively lusting after you….wow so hot. Women dance with guys all the time, doesn’t mean anything further has to happen.”

If you think she is wild and free in bed after some adult beverages, getting away from your normal environment, either a real vacation, or a “staycation” where you stay at a nice resort for a weekend that is within driving distance, just wait. There is a certain adventurousness, and sense of anonymity when you are chilling in a new place without the stress and reminders of everyday life.

If you pursue this latter strategy and arrange for a chance meeting with a black guy:

1. Make sure you tell the guy that there are no guarantees that your gf will go for it, but if he approaches her respectfully and in a non threatening but flirtatious way there is a chance all 3 of you will have a very, very enjoyable time. BUT BOTTOM LINE IS THAT IT IS YOUR GF WHO IS THE FIRST, LAST AND ONLY DECISION MAKER AS TO WHAT SHE WANTS OR DOESN’T WANT TO DO. SHE MUST CONSENT. And with that in mind…
2. Be very, very careful with respect to adult beverages. Impaired people can’t give consent. She must be cognizant of what she is doing. And you need to put her health and safety ahead of your sexual desires. If you don’t there are ramifications for your relationship, and possibly even legally so don’t let it get out of hand. You don’t want her regretting the experience and/or blaming you for not keeping her safe.

Hope that helps.

^ f0rce
"adult beverages" ... i like this

Yes, alc can be an aphrodisiac, and "tipsy" not "dr.u.nk" is definitely good advice. Also, if the Woman enjoys dancing, the scenario you are suggesting makes perfect sense. So does "away time" for being chill and anonymous in the endeavor.

One thing i do not comprehend well is what you mean by...

(...)

If you pursue this latter strategy and arrange for a chance meeting with a black guy:

1. Make sure you tell the guy that there are no guarantees that your gf will go for it, (...)

Do you mean he should set it up with the black guy beforehand? - With or without his girlfriend's involvement?

In any case nothing should be done behind her back! Cheating is not a question of who s!eeps with whom but of dishonesty and breach of trust! Never start a lifestyle that depends on these values (honesty and trust) by betraying them! Such an approach is set to fail. - But maybe you mean something completely different @Wife4Black77?

 

[skydriver]

Don’t push it. She is getting wild and into it in the bedroom. That is a huge positive. If you ******* things and go beyond what she is comfortable with you risk undermining her trust and safety concerns which will make your road much, much tougher. Just be chill.

Maybe you could take her out to a dance club and after an adult beverage tell her you think it would be so hot to watch her just dance with a black guy, nothing more than that. “To watch some good looking black guy watching you move and massively lusting after you….wow so hot. Women dance with guys all the time, doesn’t mean anything further has to happen.”

If you think she is wild and free in bed after some adult beverages, getting away from your normal environment, either a real vacation, or a “staycation” where you stay at a nice resort for a weekend that is within driving distance, just wait. There is a certain adventurousness, and sense of anonymity when you are chilling in a new place without the stress and reminders of everyday life.

If you pursue this latter strategy and arrange for a chance meeting with a black guy:

1. Make sure you tell the guy that there are no guarantees that your gf will go for it, but if he approaches her respectfully and in a non threatening but flirtatious way there is a chance all 3 of you will have a very, very enjoyable time. BUT BOTTOM LINE IS THAT IT IS YOUR GF WHO IS THE FIRST, LAST AND ONLY DECISION MAKER AS TO WHAT SHE WANTS OR DOESN’T WANT TO DO. SHE MUST CONSENT. And with that in mind…
2. Be very, very careful with respect to adult beverages. Impaired people can’t give consent. She must be cognizant of what she is doing. And you need to put her health and safety ahead of your sexual desires. If you don’t there are ramifications for your relationship, and possibly even legally so don’t let it get out of hand. You don’t want her regretting the experience and/or blaming you for not keeping her safe.

Hope that helps.

Yes, that's the way I'm approaching it so far, not pushing anything and I definitely wouldn't even think about tricking her into it or getting her passed put *******...bi want her to be into it and enjoy it, that's part of the turn on for me... and she does get into it but only "behind closed doors" and with a couple of beverages in... aside from that, I think she is just shy/nervous about the whole thing and it's hard for her to let loose, never mind getting naked with a stranger and doing things, because I know she is attracted to black guys, gets turned on by bbc and finds the idea of a threesome super hot and exciting, especially with a black guy... but seems that we just can't get over that final hurdle

 

[larry winn]

Once the idea has been successfully planted and she’s going with the fantasy of it ….whispering in her ear during sex is a great step in convincing her to make the leap…some of the lines I would feed her and notice that had touched a nerve was … “ and then you feel him deeper “ “ you’re in bed all alone with him he’s deep inside “ “ oh no he’s not wearing a condom and it’s so high risk “ ….. all this is in gentle whispers in her ear as you’re going it missionary

Then you say “ do you want to feel that ? “ you’ll hear a soft whimper “uh huh “ then say “ holding on to darker muscles as he’s making love to you deep inside unprotected “ “ feeling him slowly making love to you deep “ then say “ do you want that ?” You’ll hear a verbal “ yes “

When you know she’s ready to cum drop this on her … “ and then you feel him cum warmly deep inside … there’s nothing between you two and he’s releasing his seed deep deep inside you as you hold him “. Then say “ don’t you want that ?…. She will confidently say “ yes “ then you say I want you to feel that too .

You know she’s absolutely ready and now very much thinking about it all day long

I like this advice

 

[Kinky69fun60]

Following my reply on here. I have decided to confess to my wife what desires, I technically have but she understood it to perhaps being dirty talk in the bedroom. I waited for a good moment in our schedules to sit down and lay it all out to her. Surprisingly, she looked at me and took in the information with an open mind. We discussed some of reasons and how long I have had those feelings, she understood it was coming from a place of love. She asked for time to process all of it.

Several days went by and I decided perhaps an educational piece regarding this would help facilitate and convey my feelings, I may not be able to articulate well enough to make it less weird or creepy. It was a podcast about cucking. She listened to it and had more questions, which I happily answered.

This is where the fun started. I don’t know what happened but she considered my request. In the following days, we discussed, researched and had amazing sex, every single day (1x/week was the norm before this). Her sexual drive took off and I wasn’t sure how long I could keep it up but tried my best. We still have yet to meet someone but we are not in a rush and looking for someone who can help the new spice.

 

[larry winn]

Following my reply on here. I have decided to confess to my wife what desires, I technically have but she understood it to perhaps being dirty talk in the bedroom. I waited for a good moment in our schedules to sit down and lay it all out to her. Surprisingly, she looked at me and took in the information with an open mind. We discussed some of reasons and how long I have had those feelings, she understood it was coming from a place of love. She asked for time to process all of it.

Several days went by and I decided perhaps an educational piece regarding this would help facilitate and convey my feelings, I may not be able to articulate well enough to make it less weird or creepy. It was a podcast about cucking. She listened to it and had more questions, which I happily answered.

This is where the fun started. I don’t know what happened but she considered my request. In the following days, we discussed, researched and had amazing sex, every single day (1x/week was the norm before this). Her sexual drive took off and I wasn’t sure how long I could keep it up but tried my best. We still have yet to meet someone but we are not in a rush and looking for someone who can help the new spice.

This sounds exactly what I would like for my wife and myself

 

[Sultryangel]

Y’all are overthinking this. You should be able to approach your wives or significant other and just lay out your desires for yourself and her. No need for all this ambushing style. If she has an open mind and an unconditional love for you there is a very good chance that she will at least give it a try. Of course there will be a myriad of conversations about your desires so it’s best to be honest with her so that she can try to understand and be accommodating. This best thing my husband did was take us to a female alternative sex therapist /psychogist to help me better understand him. In the process I first learned about my own sexuality and desires and how to own it with confidence instead of shame and guilt.Since then we have truly grown as cpl further than I could have ever imagined. These bullshit tactics and guides are all garbage. Get some professional help.

 

[Sexlifeupgrade]

And if she says that she is not interested she is not interested

 

[atlwife]

You left out a very important part.
6 - show her the money

 

[nancyscuck]

Y’all are overthinking this. You should be able to approach your wives or significant other and just lay out your desires for yourself and her. No need for all this ambushing style. If she has an open mind and an unconditional love for you there is a very good chance that she will at least give it a try. Of course there will be a myriad of conversations about your desires so it’s best to be honest with her so that she can try to understand and be accommodating. This best thing my husband did was take us to a female alternative sex therapist /psychogist to help me better understand him. In the process I first learned about my own sexuality and desires and how to own it with confidence instead of shame and guilt.Since then we have truly grown as cpl further than I could have ever imagined. These bullshit tactics and guides are all garbage. Get some professional help.

Thank you I feel this is excellent advice!!!

 

[BabyDickWhite]

Here are some conclusions of related to my observations.
Discussing sex with a BBC to a woman who never had any experience with big cocks may makes her stressful.
I think porn is a bad model because it brings us an idealized version of interracial sex with bbc.

1/ Don't talk about sex with a BBC right away
2/ Show her bbc porn
3/ No plan for a distant future
4/ best environment
5/ it should look natural

1/ Don't talk about sex with bbc right away because your significant other can get stressed about this idea. She may wonder if it hurts. She does not know whether she can accommodate such a big cock.

2/ Show her porn video with BBC to see her reaction. Look at her eyes. If she can't stay focus, and can't watch the video, it means it will never work and you should forget the idea of convincing her. Conversely, If she stars at the bbc, it means she is naturally aroused by the view of a BBC. Body language is much more reliable than anything else.

3/ don't say that you have a plan "for a distant future". There is no room for uncertainty. Either you have a plan or you have no plan. Don't talk about any plans if you have no plans.

4/ the best environment is when she is relaxed. It will be easier to convince her on holidays in Cancun, Jamaica or Dominican republic rather than at your living place.

5/ things should look natural, i think it is a very big challenge to convince your woman to go to a hotel and play with a well-endowed man that she never met. It would be more natural to introduce a man to your woman and say he is your coworker, a distant friend, a friend of a relative...
Stories behind it:
I experienced situations where I witnessed how out of ordinary and difficult it was for a white woman to find herself with a BBC for the first time in her life.

Thanks, currently tryin lol

 

[rem503]

Once the idea has been successfully planted and she’s going with the fantasy of it ….whispering in her ear during sex is a great step in convincing her to make the leap…some of the lines I would feed her and notice that had touched a nerve was … “ and then you feel him deeper “ “ you’re in bed all alone with him he’s deep inside “ “ oh no he’s not wearing a condom and it’s so high risk “ ….. all this is in gentle whispers in her ear as you’re going it missionary

Then you say “ do you want to feel that ? “ you’ll hear a soft whimper “uh huh “ then say “ holding on to darker muscles as he’s making love to you deep inside unprotected “ “ feeling him slowly making love to you deep “ then say “ do you want that ?” You’ll hear a verbal “ yes “

When you know she’s ready to cum drop this on her … “ and then you feel him cum warmly deep inside … there’s nothing between you two and he’s releasing his seed deep deep inside you as you hold him “. Then say “ don’t you want that ?…. She will confidently say “ yes “ then you say I want you to feel that too .

You know she’s absolutely ready and now very much thinking about it all day long

This primer scenario gave me a boner. More wives would probably go along with this kind of encouragement.

 

[Catgirl800]

Wife bought bbc dildo squirts like crazy when ridding it will suck it while I fuck her. Loves ridding it I’m hoping she might eventually warm up to it.

 

[xxxrules]

Definitely great tips!
My gf and I seem to be stuck at step 1... we have talked about it "in the bedroom", while she is a little dr_unk and aroused and she seems to want a 3some with bbc... I even went looking for a partner (including on this site), had guys reach out, showed her their pictures, she got super turned on (she was again a little tipsy) and started saying things like "black guys are so hot" and "I want a black cock so bad".... but once out of the bedroom and when the alcohol and the arousal wears off, she has mlno interest in any of this... so what to do?

Women are emotional and not rational (mens are rational), she said yes and she means it, but after the sex, no alcohol, etc... she is less into fantasy or into sex talk. Her mood changed. But it is a good thing, you know that when your girl is arroused by you she can talk freely about sex.
Don't push it, just make her feel special and loved. Don't talk about it too often, if you have sex once a week with her, talk or use a black dildo foreplay every two weeks for example.